I have always said that I knew in that ONE moment while in Chicago. It could have been the perfect script for a movie. I was stranded. PJ came to my rescue. I was in total denial of my feelings for him until a flirty girl entered the scene. She waltzed onto my territory and I felt crazy jealous. I had known him much longer and I knew him WAY better than she ever would. I may have been a little rude to her that evening.
That was a strange new emotion for me. Or, perhaps it was simply my heart finally acknowledging what my head had been noting for years: I wanted to marry PJ Campbell.
Today we celebrate our 13th Wedding Anniversary. As I reflect on this beautiful life together, I am remembering all the little moments that we have shared during these 24 years of friendship. And I am increasingly more grateful for the man that I get to call my husband. I remember thinking one time that I have witnessed the deep-rooted character of PJ and that he would make an excellent husband because he is trust worthy. I wanted to have a husband like that someday. In the back of my mind, he became my standard.
So when did I know?
Maybe I knew, as a young middle schooler, at Camp Cowen as I watched him soak up the teaching during the outdoor chapels and sing around the campfire. He was growing in knowledge and wisdom, and learning to worship our God.
Maybe it was as he played "Dick Clark" during the 7th and 8th grade Chorus concert. He had such a fun-loving personality. The crowd adored him!
Maybe I knew, in high school, as I watched this guy cross clique barriers and befriend people from every group. He wasn't swayed by labels of "cool" or "uncool". He liked people for who they were.
Perhaps I knew over lunch as I watched him day after day lovingly serve other people in small ways: throwing away trash, inviting others to join him, walking away from gossip, and speaking encouraging words.
I probably knew after years of watching him be the first to say he was sorry and being quick to forgive others.
Maybe I knew on our high school mission trip when he didn't want to barter during our souvenir shopping break because we were there to serve the people of Mexico, not take advantage of them.
I'm sure I knew that Sunday night when I stood up and
sang a duet with my dad in front of the entire church...and did a
terrible job. I was so embarrassed. While others practiced the old adage, "if you don't have something nice to say, don't say
anything at all," PJ said the nice things and made me feel like a superstar.
I must have known as I watched him lead my youth group in worship every week. Who doesn't love a guitar playing, worship singing, youth group guy? :)
Maybe my heart was beginning to understand when this West Virginia boy took a risk and packed up everything to move to Chicago because God was calling him there. He was willing to trust God with the details.
Maybe it was starting to make sense when I followed the trail to Chicago a year later. It helped knowing that a friend was close by.
Perhaps I knew it that time I was to drive to Chicago alone in my car for the first time and he offered to let me follow him so that I wouldn't really be alone. He was willing to lay down his own agenda for the sake of my needs.
Or maybe it was when he got off the highway to head to downtown Chicago and I felt like sobbing as I drove on to Wheaton. I missed him already. Our friendship was deep.
It must have been clear to me during those late night theology talks and shared pots of coffee at The Pancake House. He wanted to know my perspective and he took me seriously.
I'm sure I knew it in that drive back to Wheaton after a day in the
city, when he challenged my thinking on tough issues. Why couldn't he
just agree with me? He was willing to love me well by speaking truth,
even when it wasn't received with grace.
Perhaps it was years of watching him choose to do the right thing, simply because it was the right thing to do. I loved his integrity.
I'm absolutely sure that I must have known I loved him on that terribly lonely day at Wheaton when he showed up just to have lunch with me. I rushed to hug him, and his arms felt like home. Yes, I think that was the really the moment I knew that I loved this man. It all made sense. I had known it all along.
PJ gave me this necklace just before I set off to leave for mission work with the Center for Student Missions. I was 18 years old. He wore it everyday. I'm not exactly sure as to why he gave it to me. Maybe a token of friendship. Maybe a beacon of truth or a reminder of home. Honestly, the details are a bit fuzzy for me after all these years. But this I know, I have kept it with me for 18 years and it still brings a smile to my face as I remember the gift that I have in my dear friend and excellent husband.
Proof of Life
Finding the Sacred in Everyday Life
Lamentations 3:21-24
" But this I call to mind and therefore I have hope: The steadfast love of the LORD never ceases; his mercies never come to an end; they are new every morning; great is your faithfulness. 'The LORD is my portion' says my soul. 'Therefore, I will hope in him.'" Lamentations 3:21-24
Monday, August 22, 2016
Friday, February 27, 2015
100 Day Party with Doctor Who!
It seems like just yesterday that I planned our 100 Day Party for Abby. How is it that 100 Days of Kindergarten has finally arrived for Caedmon? Slow down, my kids. Slow down!
Caedmon and my husband are slightly obsessed with Doctor Who...so what better way to celebrate 100 Days of School than with a Time Lord? :)
Here is how we celebrated our 100th Day of School. (Abby is so excited to be the oldest because, as she stated, "I get to do the 100th day of Kindergarten 2 more times!")
100 Day Pancakes!
They have been collecting one Lego a day, building up to a surprise Lego set at the end.
The TARDIS from Doctor Who. My husband made this from a large refrigerator box from Lowe's, 3 blue plastic table cloths, printed up details from the internet, and 2 wall mounted night lights from Wal-mart. Total project was less than $10! Then we filled it with 100 balloons!
There was a lot of screaming, jumping, and excitement when they walked into the living room to find a balloon-filled TARDIS!
They then created a bar graph of the colors.
And red won! This was a great exercise in regrouping for my 2nd grader as I had her add all the numbers to double check that we had 100. We were originally missing 3 colors, so we had to go back and recount them. (That was not a popular idea, but the OCD in my could not rest without knowing for sure!)
We had such a fun day and made many wonderful memories!
Caedmon and my husband are slightly obsessed with Doctor Who...so what better way to celebrate 100 Days of School than with a Time Lord? :)
Here is how we celebrated our 100th Day of School. (Abby is so excited to be the oldest because, as she stated, "I get to do the 100th day of Kindergarten 2 more times!")
The Kindergarten boy version! |
The 2nd grade girl version |
The 2 year old "I ate all of my chocolate chips instead of decorating my pancakes" version |
Filling in the 100th day of on the chart! |
I love seeing the progress. He hated even holding a pencil at the beginning of the year. Such improvement! |
My favorite part was watching what they built all along the way before they even had instructions. |
Yep. My 5 year old is dressed as the Doctor (complete with bow-tie) and is pointing his Sonic Screwdriver at me. |
Math included sorting and counting the balloons by color. First, though, they predicted which color would be the most abundant. They both predicted red.
They then created a bar graph of the colors.
And red won! This was a great exercise in regrouping for my 2nd grader as I had her add all the numbers to double check that we had 100. We were originally missing 3 colors, so we had to go back and recount them. (That was not a popular idea, but the OCD in my could not rest without knowing for sure!)
We had such a fun day and made many wonderful memories!
Thursday, February 12, 2015
In Memory of a Wonderful Valentine
I LOVE Valentine's Day. There I said it. I love going into stores and seeing shelves covered in pinks, reds and purples. I love all the hearts. I love the stuffed animals. I love the chocolates. It all makes me feel warm and fuzzy and happy. I don't even care if it is a manufactured holiday wrapped up in commercialism. I love the day.
Yesterday, my kids celebrated Valentine's Day at our homeschool co-op. It was great fun...a little chaotic...but full of good memories. Last week, each kid decorated a paper Valentine bag with stickers. This week, the bags were set up and the kids filled them with goodies for each other...well, I think mostly the parents filled the bags, but the kids loved getting the bags with all the candies, cards, pencils and stickers. It was fun to sit back and watch kids of all ages rush in at lunchtime, eager to see what awaited them.
I get happy memories just by holding the little sticker-covered paper bags....the excitement of seeing which friends gave the cutest valentine, or the best candy. Watching my kids dig through the bags after school was a deeper level of joy for me as the parent. Who doesn't love to be loved? It feels good to be known. It brings pleasure to our hearts to celebrate friendships. We find rest when we are loved.
This little Valentine exchange also brought me back to another Valentine's Day that didn't feel quite so restful and pleasure-filled...at least not at first. The setting was a high school cafeteria. I was eating my lunch from a paper bag. My hair was a big, curly 90's style. I was probably donning a silk shirt and vest. I was surrounded by a few close girlfriends and filled with lots of insecurities. A guy friend (of a friend, of a friend) came by our circle on that fateful day and handed every girl a red, heart-shaped sucker...every girl, that is, except me. Yep. There in a circle of about 5 girls, I was deliberately left out. Forsaken. Embarrassingly set apart. I was crushed. My day was ruined.
I came home that afternoon and sobbed my eyes out. I was too embarrassed to ever return to school. I had no idea, at the time, about homeschooling, but if I had known, I'm sure I would have begged my mom to keep me home. My shallow semblance of any kind of confidence was shattered forever. Life. Was. Over.
Until my dad came home from work. After I told him what happened, he loaded us all up into the car and we went out for dinner. After dinner, Dad stopped for a final errand at a store and returned to our car carrying a big box of chocolate candy. Just. For. Me. I don't remember exactly what he said, but I know it was something witty about chocolates being way better than a sucker anyway.
My dad loved to love me. He knew me. He celebrated my value as his daughter. He brought rest to my soul and healing to my heart by purposefully showing me his love. My Dad loved me well that day, and I am thankful for the memory of it.
That afternoon in high school, I remember feeling unloved, broken, insecure. But my dad reminded me that he fully accepted me simply because I was his daughter. I did not have to prove to him that I was worthy of his love. His simple act of cherishing me has helped me to be purposeful in loving others well.
My dad's gift that Valentine's night was more than just a box of chocolates. His gift is a beautiful picture of a deeper truth of my Heavenly Father's love for me. It was His gift to me, not a thing I have had to earn. Jesus' love brings rest to my soul and healing to my heart. In Him, I am fully known, fully loved, and fully accepted. Jesus loves me this I know...and I can love because He first loved me. (1 John 4:19)
Happy Valentine's Day, Dad. Thank you for loving me so well. I love you, too.
Saturday, September 13, 2014
Why Do I Homeschool?
As a child, my personal experience in a public school
setting was a positive one. I loved my school years. I was blessed with good
teachers and amazing friends! I have no
bad feelings towards traditional school.
Very dear friends of mine are teachers in private and public school
settings. I have other friends who send their children to private and public
schools. My journey of homeschooling
begins very simply with my enjoyment of teaching and having my kids at home.
I began researching homeschooling after my oldest was born.
My husband recommended a book (which became the catalyst in my desire to teach
at home) called For the Children’s Sake. In her book, Macaulay discusses the benefits
of a Charlotte Mason approach to education. I want to begin my story with a very important reminder and quote from
Macaulay:
There will be different
applications of these ideas for different families…more than that, different
children within one family may need different decisions as to what educational
system is best for them. And it is
important to apply Jesus’ teaching that we must not judge other peoples’
choices. Just because I decide to send
my little Tom to the local public school or a private Christian school, or
because I decide to give him a home education does not mean that everyone else
has to do the same. It is a complicated situation.” (pg. 8)
This is my story of how I came to homeschool my children, why I continue to homeschool, a
few of my personal struggles as a homeschooling mom, and what God has been
teaching me as I learn to teach my children.
*******
“What do you want
to be when you grow up?” my second grade teacher asked.
My hand shot up
into the air, “I want to be a housewife!” I enthusiastically replied.
For as long as I can remember, I wanted to be a wife and
mommy. I went onto college, because I
realized the importance of having a back-up plan and because I was good at
school. I enjoyed taking tests and
getting good grades. I knew how to study
and how to do well in school. College
seemed like the next logical step. Looking back, I’m so thankful for my college
education because it gave me a deeper, broader worldview than I would have had otherwise.
In college, my first roommate was a homeschooler. I had
never even heard the term “homeschooled” before meeting her. It didn’t take
very long to realize a huge difference between us. While we both were “good at”
school, she enjoyed learning. She could lose herself in books for hours,
and she actually retained information beyond the exam. I loved listening to her talk because she was
passionate about what she was learning. I would later meet many other
homeschooled students in college, each one so wonderfully unique but with one
common thread: they enjoyed learning.
Years later, I re-read For the Children’s
Sake, and Macaulay’s ideas ignited excitement in me. I loved the ideas presented in her book about
how children are hungry for learning and are capable of far more than we give
them. They enjoy depth in learning. Children are often not only eager to read
what Charolotte Mason describes as “living books” (books that come alive,
involving one’s emotions) but also to narrate the story back to others. Mason’s
methods include using atmosphere, discipline and life to educate a child. She offers that children can learn outside of
the four walls of a school building, through play and daily interactions. Macaulay described situations in which
children received individual attention, followed their own interests in
learning, created space for enjoying God through nature, and experienced
character training through real life. I became hooked on this idea of an alternative
system of education.
As I began to dig deeper into homeschooling, I began to see
a beautiful picture of all the ways we could incorporate learning into…well…everything! I began to personally fall in love with
learning and then realized that I wanted my kids to fall in love with learning for the sake of learning, not for the sake of passing a test. (Though, I really do
enjoy tests…I know it’s weird, but that’s what I liked about school: the
tests.) So, we jumped into our homeschooling journey and I found that I really
enjoy discovering alongside of my kids. As
they look at the world in wonder and amazement, I also begin to see things anew.
It’s fun! I
homeschool because it is fun for the kids but it is fun for me too! I love
being present when that “light bulb” moment occurs. When C-A-T actually becomes a character in a
living story, and suddenly they can read and want to read. I relish the moments when all the practice becomes a
dinner time discussion, or when a child asks to make a time line to keep track
of all the historical characters she’s been reading about! These are the moments that make the hard work
a delight.
Most days we are finished with school by lunchtime which
leaves the afternoons wide open for pursuing interests and hobbies. I have come
to really appreciate this aspect of homeschooling. Currently, my daughter is delving
into anything regarding horses and also learning to crochet. My oldest son enjoys bugs. He spends his afternoons with his “bug
catcher,” journal, and field guide. While set school hours are a must for our
family, I am learning to appreciate the beauty of learning outside of the
curriculum and away from the work table.
I have discovered that I deeply enjoy spending our long days
together. I enjoy the friendships that I am making with each of my children.
Though my first priority is to be Parent (one who guides, instructs, disciplines
and disciples my children), if I neglect
developing a friendship with each child, then I am missing out on some of the
deepest connections I will ever know. No
one makes me belly-laugh quite like my kiddos!
In addition, we have time to spend on deep conversations. My daughter seems to feel most comfortable
opening up about what is on her heart during lunch. When those conversations come up, I never
regret spending extra time exploring her thoughts and growing together.
Homeschooling isn’t without its struggles, however. My kids have never seen the inside of a
classroom except on T.V. shows like Elmo,
Blue’s Clues and Sid the Science Kid. I often
feel like they think they are missing out on something. I find myself trying to
make our homeschool, just like traditional school. In fact, I spent the entire
first month of my homeschooling endeavors trying to be like the teacher on Sid the Science Kid.
Wondering if I’m “messing them up” haunted me the first two
years of homeschooling. I just wanted to know that they would turn out okay
(Don’t we all struggle with that question?). My mommy-guilt still gets the best of me sometimes, especially on yet another rainy day, when everyone is arguing and mommy
loses her temper again or when we
just do not get around to a particular project or subject. I am prone to think that I’m probably ruining
them or at best setting them back behind their peers.
But it is on those
days that I find it helpful to “reset” my perspective with truth. I remind myself of why I homeschool and the
things that we all enjoy about this journey.
I take time to look back and reflect on the areas that I see growth: academically
and emotionally. End of the school year
tests have been helpful to confirm that we are on the right track, but more
than that, I see in my kids an eagerness to learn and passions growing.
Community is also so essential to my sanity. Surrounding myself
with other homeschooling moms who have walked the road a little longer and can offer
advice or a listening ear has been a gift to my soul many times! These ladies
help me remember my goals.
An unexpected product of this educational journey has been
the truth that God is teaching me through
homeschooling my children. He teaches me
of His everyday graces, His gifts to me simply because He loves me. He is teaching me obedience and faithfulness
to the job at hand. He teaches me
discipline and perseverance daily. I never
expected to receive character training as I trained up my children, however,
patience and humility are listed daily on my lesson plans from Him. The Lord is doing a good and faithful work in
every member of this family through our homeschooling journey.
Homeschooling is absolutely THE HARDEST thing I have done so
far in this life. Honestly, every
February, I think to myself that I must surely be a crazy woman to consider
this endeavor. Every August, after the
excitement of school supply and curriculum shopping passes, I look at my
husband and ask, “Have I taken on more than I can handle? What was I thinking?”
It is a big, scary job! (I want to mention here, that my husband has been a huge encouragement to me in this area. He is the backbone to our family and helps to refocus my vision.)
I am certainly not perfect in all of my ideals. As much as I want my kids to play outside and
enjoy God through nature, they have watched a lot of T.V. this weekend while I
cleaned and wrote this blog. As much as
I relish their creativity and want to foster exploration, I fussed and fumed
when my kids made a big mess in the living room yesterday. BUT the daily grace I
have learned through homeschooling is that learning takes place in all
things…even in apologies and re-do’s.
Sunday, September 7, 2014
Lists and Responsiblities
I am absolutely awful with charts. Reward charts, responsibility charts, reading charts, behavior charts, allowance charts, eat-your-veggies charts. I look at them and dream of all the stickers that will fill those beautiful pages. I have tried them...all sorts of them. And I'm really good at completing at least one day! And then I get distracted.
"How many minutes did you read? Oh...I didn't time it, either. Let's give you 3 stickers."
"When was the last time you did your chores? I don't remember, either. Um...probably shouldn't give you any stickers. Let's start over, okay?"
"You were really kind today...but how do I measure 'kindness'...let's say 5 stickers!"
BUT, I LOVE lists! I can create lists all day long. I make to-do lists for myself everyday.
So, this summer, I tried a no-nonsense-to-do list approach. And it has WORKED for us!!!
Here is our simple chore list which hangs at kid-eye-level.
a = Abby (and yes, I realize the "a" is backwards in the picture. We have a resident 2 year old here.)
c = Caedmon
o = Once a week duties (usually on Saturday)
e = Extras, or special jobs which results an allowance to be saved for toys they want to buy.
(I bought these really cool letter magnets for Abby about 6 years ago from Ollie's...turns out, oddly enough, that after I made my to-do lists, these letters were 4 of only 8-ish that I have left from the whole set...worked out perfectly for displaying my lists! I love when a plan comes together!)
Above the orange line are "musts". Those things simply have to be done everyday. Below the orange line are things that are "as needed:". For example, once Abby straightens the bookshelf, it is usually not out of order for several days. She will check it and replace any books she finds. But if it's not messy, then she can move onto the next thing.
Every Saturday, I switch the "a" and the "c". Both kids LOVE to clean the toilet. That is the prized list. Both kids hate to do the bookshelf. See, they have so much in common...and they think of themselves as complete opposites! :)
It works out great to switch the jobs every week because it gives us all a change of pace. And if one child is not particularly "good" at a job (as in, when cleaning the litter box, a certain child gets freaked out by the poop and flings it into the trash can, scattering litter all over the place) then we can all take heart that it is only for 6 more days until they can switch again. I help where needed, but for the most part, they take care of their chores without much involvement on my part, leaving me to drink coffee and eat chocolate bon-bons. :) (yeah right...more like washing the dishes and picking up after the 2 year old!)
Both kids have been saving up for special toys they wanted to buy. This week, they were really motivated (that is to say, competitive) and each picked several things from the "e" list. Not only was the house clean from regular chores, but they also cleaned the van, the fridge, the windows and even donated some toys! A definite win for this mom! And we celebrated by a fun-guilt-free trip to Toys-R-Us and Wal-Mart. I may be crazy...but I'm pretty sure they have played with these new toys with extra enjoyment because of the hard work involved!
We have been using this system since May. I think I have finally found a system that works for us!
Tell me, what works in your home?
"How many minutes did you read? Oh...I didn't time it, either. Let's give you 3 stickers."
"When was the last time you did your chores? I don't remember, either. Um...probably shouldn't give you any stickers. Let's start over, okay?"
"You were really kind today...but how do I measure 'kindness'...let's say 5 stickers!"
BUT, I LOVE lists! I can create lists all day long. I make to-do lists for myself everyday.
So, this summer, I tried a no-nonsense-to-do list approach. And it has WORKED for us!!!
Here is our simple chore list which hangs at kid-eye-level.
a = Abby (and yes, I realize the "a" is backwards in the picture. We have a resident 2 year old here.)
c = Caedmon
o = Once a week duties (usually on Saturday)
e = Extras, or special jobs which results an allowance to be saved for toys they want to buy.
(I bought these really cool letter magnets for Abby about 6 years ago from Ollie's...turns out, oddly enough, that after I made my to-do lists, these letters were 4 of only 8-ish that I have left from the whole set...worked out perfectly for displaying my lists! I love when a plan comes together!)
Above the orange line are "musts". Those things simply have to be done everyday. Below the orange line are things that are "as needed:". For example, once Abby straightens the bookshelf, it is usually not out of order for several days. She will check it and replace any books she finds. But if it's not messy, then she can move onto the next thing.
Every Saturday, I switch the "a" and the "c". Both kids LOVE to clean the toilet. That is the prized list. Both kids hate to do the bookshelf. See, they have so much in common...and they think of themselves as complete opposites! :)
It works out great to switch the jobs every week because it gives us all a change of pace. And if one child is not particularly "good" at a job (as in, when cleaning the litter box, a certain child gets freaked out by the poop and flings it into the trash can, scattering litter all over the place) then we can all take heart that it is only for 6 more days until they can switch again. I help where needed, but for the most part, they take care of their chores without much involvement on my part, leaving me to drink coffee and eat chocolate bon-bons. :) (yeah right...more like washing the dishes and picking up after the 2 year old!)
Both kids have been saving up for special toys they wanted to buy. This week, they were really motivated (that is to say, competitive) and each picked several things from the "e" list. Not only was the house clean from regular chores, but they also cleaned the van, the fridge, the windows and even donated some toys! A definite win for this mom! And we celebrated by a fun-guilt-free trip to Toys-R-Us and Wal-Mart. I may be crazy...but I'm pretty sure they have played with these new toys with extra enjoyment because of the hard work involved!
We have been using this system since May. I think I have finally found a system that works for us!
Tell me, what works in your home?
Monday, September 1, 2014
Vikings!!
Today did not feel like a win-day.
I'm thankful for re-do's and grace. I'm thankful for my husband's encouraging words that help me persevere.
And so, we stepped aside from other tasks and delved into a book about Vikings. We had this really big car seat box and the kids wanted to make a Viking boat. So, we came up with this:
It was fun using their ideas to create this project together. This is their drakkar (dragon ship) complete with dragon head and tail, sail and ores. |
Batman had to join us...Caleb doesn't quite understand the idea of time period pretend play yet. |
Leif Ericsson displaying his manly facial and chest hair. |
Leif's wife. She's a hard worker...she did all of the rowing. |
Abby shaped this Dragon prow for the boat. |
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